Spring.

It always gets people in a thinking mood. Relationships go on the fritz because one, the other or both parties may be thinking about the future, thinking about why they got married in the first place, where they are going in life (marriage? kids?), or when they should just come out and say how unhappy they are with one another so they can move on. Jobs become unstable; they are a melting pot, nowadays, a cluster(m)uck of personalities that clash, mesh, or go stale when mixed. Inquiries form in an employees mind like - "Will I ever get recognized?" - or just simple thoughts: "I can't believe it's been (X amount) of years already", "Thank goodness I have a job now, with the economy going the way it is..." And of course with time, people change. Friends, family, acquaintances, colleagues, etc. Sometimes they change in a way you can't really handle, but then you have to realize that it's a part of life and...sometimes, you just have to deal with it.

Stepping outside of myself, I've gone through a lot of emotional, stressful situations, or -''equations'- that I could not figure out for the life of me. I've grown to learn (and I have been told) that in time, these things will work themselves out and as far as I look at a lot of things now, it is to know that everything happens for a reason. Yes, cliche, I know. But it's quite true. So I don't get a job that will help me out, financially. So I flub up a song or a line when I'm performing on stage. So I mess up morale by speaking up, thinking I helped somebody. I shouldn't feel like complete dirt about it. It just means something I did may made an impact elsewhere, enough to take me where I need to be.

I was told that when you do the right thing, even though it doesn't feel like I've done any good -- it will, in the long run. Good deeds don't always come with reward. As fortune cookie as that's sounded to me, I thank that person for telling me that because for a while, I kept getting down on myself.

Thank you to my friends, for listening to me, for being my rock.
For being awesome.
For knowing what cheers me up when I fall down.
For reading my contemplative rants about my life, even though they may not make sense.

It's stressful nowadays, and I know it can only be from here on out...at least, until I find my place.